Make Believe.

I know what it is. I get it.

I don't want to go on anymore. Not for anyone, not for myself.. for nothing.

I'd rather just self destruct. I don't want to think anymore, I really don't. I don't want to think about anything.

I just need to blow up. Take down everything around me with me probably. Create a large crater on the ground.

But just not be anymore.

I think, therefore I am.

I don't want to be. I don't like thinking anymore. I want to stop.

I don't care anymore. Haven't really cared about myself since a very long time now, but now I don't care about anyone or anything else at all.

I don't want anything in life. I don't want 'life.'

I'd rather not be here anymore, if it means finding out once and for all what we were supposed to be doing here to begin with. And see if there really is a God or not.

My crazy hair, that I never pay any attention to. My fingers that always have a cigarette in between them. My confused mind that's constantly finding something wrong with everything.

Nothing is ever satisfactory. Nothing at all.

People find peace in Religion somehow, and I don't get it.

" Isn't itenough to see that a garden is beautiful without having to believe that there are fairies at the bottom of it too? ..."

- Douglas Adams, The Hitchiker's Guide To The Galaxy.

But is the garden really beautiful? Why are we not in Eden? We didn't eat the forbidden fruit. We do now, but we can't help it, can we?

What about people that are still oblivious to religion and God. How is it their fault that they don't believe, if they don't even know? Are they getting a free pass to heaven, then?

If they are, why was I told about Religion to begin with?

What is better? Living happy in the life you are certain about, or thinking about being happy in a life no one is really certain of? And if you are, then I don't understand how you can just believe things without actually ...

Let's not get into this.

"Dunya ke is shor main, seekha hai mar ke hoti hai zindagi kya."

Dhalta din majboor hai, aur manzil bohot door hai.

I'm not a very nice person, stop thinking that I am. Stop making me feel guilty, for giving everyone the impression that I'm this perfect human being. I'm not. There's no such thing.

In fact - if God spoke to you, told you a sure fire way to get into heaven? He'd probably tell you to stay as far away from me as possible.

I know what it is, the secret to making it in this world. To all the riches. It's fooling the people you can fool, tricking the people you can trick, lying to the people you can lie to. And that is success. Being better.

People don't have good intentions, no one really does. Neither do they have bad intentions. All intentions are just to satisfy their own needs. Good or Bad can't define it.

There is no Good, there is no Evil. There's just us. Humans.

Good things don't just happen to people, people have to make good things happen. Bad things, however, just do. How is that fair?

Cynacism, and Agnosticism. That's where it really is. Sitting on the fence. I don't want to know what's going on either sides, I just can't be bothered anymore.

Why do people read love poems and then wait their whole lives waiting for 'the one'?

The 'one' doesn't exist. There are just people, here and there. There is no one perfect, and you're never going to find anyone perfect. There are people with things you like, and the same people also have things you hate it. Live with it.

So why do you insist on placing people on a high chair, and then get disappointed when they show you just how human they are?

There's no point. Why are we dying to live, when we're just living to die?

Everything in between? How is any of it worth it. Happiness is just a myth. No one can ever, really be happy. Just like world peace is. It's just not possible. Humans WANT to kill each other. We'll never get tired of it. We want conflict. Without conflict, there won't even be temporary peace. World peace, forever, is a myth. Happiness is a myth.

What's the point in feeling sorry for anyone? Either acknowledge that there is no God, or acknowledge that bad things only happen to people because of what they do themselves. So which one is it?

Love.

Valentine's day cards, are just that. They're not good love poems. Love poems aren't happy, love poems are supposed to be dark, and gritty. That's how it is, that's just what love is. You can't really give your 'lover' a love poem on valentine's day. Unless you want them wondering whether you really 'love' them or not. And that's where hallmark and valentine's day cards come in.

Selling people what they want to believe. And everyone just gulps it up. Humans.

"Balance will help you not to destroy yourself," my professor tells me.

Define Balance.

Don't Panic. And don't bother commenting.