Self Therapy

I am officially depressed now. Why? Don't ask. Maybe I'm homesick, maybe I miss my friends, but whatever it is, it's brought my insomnia back. Woohoo.

But I've finally found a solution; I need to tire myself out completely, until my body gives up. Until it is literally impossible for me to stay awake. Only then can I fall asleep. And it works, too. I tried it out just yesterday, and slept like a baby. A baby having a very ugly nightmare, but sleeping is the main point of my argument here.

I was sitting in the college cafeteria today, and I felt the loneliest I have ever felt. I had slept for only 4 hours so I put my head down on the table, and listened to people all around the cafeteria talk and share laughter. The only humane interaction I had, was when every once in a while someone came along to ask if they could borrow chairs from the table. Until there were no chairs left. And then that stopped too.

I'm doing well in my classes, and I feel my real potential is being finally sparked. No longer am I a working-class student, finally.

And what exactly is bothering me? I don't know. I really don't. It's in the corner of my head, where I keep all the information I don't like to share with the rest of the world. Didn't know that? Now you do; I have a place in my head that has things that only I know, and feelings that I don't like sharing with people. It's a gemini thing, I think. And apparently, even I can't get in. It's like I forgot the password or misplaced the key, or something. I love metaphors.

Apart from that, I finally have internet at the apartement, so yay. I can write on my blog again!

My english professor, after reading the paper I handed in, called me "Guile." Quickly adding that he meant Guile in a good way. I think that is awesome.

I'm going to call it a night, I am too tired to even write ... thanks for coming, though.